THE SHARTED NERFBALL

This dish dawned on me while I was thinking of how to use "shart" in a recipe title – it also…happened to me.

Everybody has “played” with Nerf Products - Everybody (I'd like to think) has sharted – So:

When I was 24 I swallowed a Super Nerf Ball. Some faggit left it in the party spread! Thanks to probiotics and Nerf Foamings I didn’t need much of an exit strategy – RIGHT? RIGHT? Right. But. I had also (within the same standing) consumed 16 browncat brews (measure it yourself I wasa wizard I won it!), 2 pounds o’ smog dogs, some bees’ tea w/ bees’ tees, 4 burpless cucumbers and a spot of carpet. And you’re all like “NOOOOOT BAD!” after this I swilled some pepto, which should have, by all accounts, sealed my corn solid. RIGHT?

No explanation for the shart. Did the cucumber redirect the blow south? Did that pin-up doll make me anxious? Was I marathon dancing? Were the smogs over miced? All I know is that it sounded like a fucking barking rat in the middle of the dance floor, black beads barreling across my thighs like hot tar. I fell to my knees with a “FWHOAT!” and stayed there. Nobody could touch me. I felt like 10 bucks.

N-E-WAY I bunny foo fooed the fuck out and wound up with this Great Idea for Any Occasion!

2 cans o' black beans
green onion chopped fine
garlic
cilantro
teaspoon cumin
teaspoon oregano
teaspoon rosemary
salt
pepper
1 cup brown rice cooked
1/2 cup corn meal
olive oil

mince n' mash, pack n fry. line up the balls, your frituras de frijoles negros are complete. add gorilla guac and you'll be shuking in no time.

want more black foods? try squeezing a squid! i had black pasta the other night.